Proverbs 3:5-6
5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; 6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall [a]direct your paths.
As I sit here studying for an exam, I began to pray. My prayer, started off with, “Lord, please please, don’t let me fail.” God asked, “Where is your heart right now? Are you submitting everything to me, or are you trying to do this in your own works and using me as back up?”
Talk about a revelatory moment. I began to realize that I really wasn’t trusting God in my process at all. God was more so the cushion I fell back on if I didn’t get it right. I had to fight anxiety because I allowed my faith to be in my own hands. I had to fight depression because I chose to ignore the savior. I had to fight insecurity because I had no clue who God created me to be in that time.
As I began to humble myself to really hear from God, I realized that initially I wasn’t really going to God at all. I embraced the fear more than I embraced God and my faith in Him. I went to God because it was the right thing to do, not because I really believed in Him. Operating in fear can sometimes appear like the there is progress, but in reality, there is pride.
Imagine a child asking their parents to make a certain dish, but before that parent can respond the child has gone into the kitchen and made an attempt at the dish themselves. Although the dish looks and may even taste ok, it couldn’t compare to what the parent would have done. This is what we do when we go to God but with doubt, fear, or just plain lack of trust.
Our emotions get the best of us and even when God does speak, we can’t hear through our own thoughts. It’s time to 100% really let go and to cast our cares to God. What does trusting God really look like to you? Can you say that you’ve trusted God 100%? If you’ve been through a lot in life where you can’t trust those around you, it can affect how we trust God. But we have to understand and accept that God is not like man. That God is here for us, but we have to seek Him.
So, as you study. As you deal with life’s problems. I challenge you to turn to God. I challenge you to really let go and allow God to take care of your cares. If there are fears, doubts, etc that you recognize preventing you from really letting go, it’s time to pray. It’s time to fast. Connect with your mentor so that they can disciple you through this time to receive the freedom that you need.
Prayer:
Dear Lord, please forgive me for not coming to you with a pure heart. I repent and humble myself before you. I need help with these situations, but I know that I also need help submitting them to you. I come to you as humble as I know how. I lift you up and I decrease. Lord I trust you with ALL of my heart Lord, I no longer hold back, but give you my all. In Jesus name, Amen.